Introduction

Handysides hadn't always been a failure.

But then no-one is ever "always a failure". I mean, it'd be a pretty harsh thing to say to a child just after birth:

"You are a failure".

What kind of start is that for a kid? Condemning them to a life of mediocrity the second they emerge from their warm hiding place.

A slap in the face broke his reverie.

Handysides eyes re-focussed gradually, before they were swiftly unfocussed by a punch in the face. But never let it be said that Handysides Lindsay falls after the first blow.

It was funny, he'd always found the taste of blood to be "not that bad". Other people gagged when made to tip their heads back to stop a nose bleed, Handysides just lay back and enjoyed it. But then, he always was good at lying back...

Oh, a boot in the face. That always tends to wake you up from whatever strange world your brain takes you to. He had to admit this wasn't going the way ti had done in his head. Surely if someone called you a failure, YOU were supposed to administer the kicking?